


So Kiss Me and Smile for Me

by oomunhy



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Friendship/Love, Love without Hope, M/M, Mutual Pining, other members are mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-14
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-12-15 02:44:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11796780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oomunhy/pseuds/oomunhy
Summary: All he needed to do was ask.Maybe he should. He should ask, right? He would. Maybe. He didn’t even know what to ask. He didn’t want to know the answer. He was afraid of the answer. And he didn’t do feelings. No. Kihyun would not text Hyunwoo asking the schedule of his departure. That was a fact.Yoo Kihyun was an A-plus coward. That was another fact.





	So Kiss Me and Smile for Me

All he needed to do was ask.

It wasn’t that hard, really. He just needed to type the question and then send it to the number he had memorized so well in his mind.

Kihyun sighed for the umpteenth time that day alone, wondering if he should ask. He thought having a day off would lessen his stress, but he wasn’t fooling anyone. Kihyun couldn’t let his mind wander from Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo, his beloved hyung, who he hadn’t met for almost half a year. Hyunwoo, who was as sweet as everything Kihyun had, yet as bitter as the word ‘almost’ dancing around them. Hyunwoo, who Kihyun cherished with his whole heart.

Kihyun and Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo and Kihyun. They used to be unbreakable. Hyunwoo was the best in his dance class and Kihyun was the best in his own vocal class. They worked together for many projects, and they excelled at it. Nothing could hold them down, not even the chains of Amistad. Kihyun always felt like he owned the world when he was with Hyunwoo.

Except Kihyun and Hyunwoo was never something. Contrary to the popular beliefs, they weren’t together.

_“Kihyun, where’s your boyfriend?” They would ask._

_“He’s not my boyfriend,” Kihyun always answered. Yet he always knew where to find Hyunwoo._

They heard rumours about them, but they shut the world off. They didn’t talk about it, because Kihyun and Hyunwoo didn’t do feelings. Because both knew, the invisible line was always there, preventing them to go further and ruin the only thing they owned together, their friendship. Nevertheless, Kihyun was happy.

But nothing stayed the same.

Hyunwoo graduated and worked in a big entertainment agency. It was a bit far from their campus, but it wasn’t unreachable. Still, their time together was decreasing. Kihyun pretended to not notice by making himself busy with college works and final project. Then Kihyun graduated, and worked part-time for a songwriter named Min Yoongi before he could actually sing. The distance got wider. And the next time they met up, they were no longer Kihyun and Hyunwoo that they used to be. They were just part-timer Kihyun and entertainer Hyunwoo.

_Nothing was the same. Maybe we shouldn’t meet up that often._

It was unspoken. Yet they both understood.

And so, they didn’t. Except those times when their friends got together and told them to come. Which was around six months ago, on Changkyun’s birthday dinner, when Hyunwoo told all of them about the news. And Kihyun felt proud, because it was Hyunwoo.

Hyunwoo, who planned to work with Western artists after graduation, and had been working on it ever since long time ago. Hyunwoo, who had wonderfully landed himself a job as a dancer for a Hollywood production, but they were working on the permission and stuffs from the agency before he could really go.

This time of the year should be the time Hyunwoo would leave. But Kihyun didn’t know when, or where to, or even if Hyunwoo would really go. Kihyun wanted to ask.

Maybe he should. He should ask, right? He would. Maybe. He didn’t even know what to ask. He didn’t want to know the answer. He was afraid of the answer. And he didn’t do feelings. No. Kihyun would not text Hyunwoo asking the schedule of his departure. That was a fact.

Yoo Kihyun was an A-plus coward. That was another fact.

 

* * *

 

Hyunwoo had been staring on his phone for the last ten minutes. He had separated his way from his friends. Hoseok, the ever-loving Hoseok, one of few friends from college that he kept in touch with – also his roommate, had gone home after leaving a trail of tears upon Hyunwoo’s departure. Same went with Jooheon. The pool of tears in his eyes wasn’t fooling anyone, despite his insistence that he wasn’t crying. The only sober one was Changkyun, but the boy didn’t let go from Hyunwoo’s hold for a full five minutes. Hyunwoo missed them already.

Both Hyungwon and Minhyuk had texted him their goodbyes, telling him to do well. But there was no text from Kihyun. Not ever since the last time they met. To be fair, he hadn’t told Kihyun that he was leaving to Hollywood. _Not that Kihyun cared_ , his mind supplied.

Hyunwoo knew he shouldn’t bother Kihyun and his perfect life. They were out of each other’s lives anyway. But maybe Hyunwoo just wanted to meet the younger, maybe just to see his smile, maybe just to hold Kihyun under his arms.

Just maybe.

The night before his departure, Hyunwoo was still waiting to Kihyun to text first, which he knew that it would be unlikely. Kihyun wouldn’t know if Hyunwoo leaving. None of their mutual friends would tell Kihyun anyway, since they made their own assumptions that Hyunwoo and Kihyun had broken up. Hyunwoo almost scoffed when Jooheon asked him about the breakup, but Hyunwoo didn’t have an answer. They didn’t even get the chance to get together, how would they break up already?

 

* * *

 

“Kihyun, what are you doing here?” Minhyuk asked him as soon as he entered their shared apartment.

“Uh, studying?”

Minhyuk looked at Kihyun like he had grown another head, “You didn’t go to the airport?”

“Why would I go to the airport?” Kihyun frowned, feeling uneasy already from the way Minhyuk talked.

“Hyunwoo-hyung’s flight – wait, you didn’t know?”

Kihyun felt dizzy.

“What is it? What do you mean by Hyunwoo-hyung’s flight?”

“He’s leaving for the Hollywood production, remember? The flight was tonight, but I couldn’t come to the airport because of work. I thought –”

But Kihyun cut his words off. He hurriedly collected his books from the table and walked towards his bedroom. “It’s okay, Minhyukkie, thanks for letting me know.”

He wanted to throw up his lunch earlier that day.

 

* * *

 

Hyunwoo arrived in JFK in one piece. He was tired, but the excitement of living the dream was more than enough to cover his tiredness. The representative of the production came to collect him and would take him to take care of things. Everything went in a fast pace that he felt dizzy. Fortunately, they provided a room in a hotel for him to stay for a while before he could move into the dorm permanently.

After he settled down in his room, he immediately connect to the Wi-Fi and checked his phone. There were five messages in, two were from his mom and three others were from Hoseok. _What a possessive friend_ , Hyunwoo thought.

But they were also two voicemails. Hyunwoo frowned. He never got voicemails once in his life. Pushing the button, he listened to the first message. He didn’t expect that he would be hearing the voice of the one that he missed the most.

_“Hyung, hello. It’s - it’s Kihyun.”_

There was a long silence that Hyunwoo thought the message was cut off right there. But then he heard a rustling sound from the other side before Kihyun spoke again.

_“I heard from Minhyuk that you’ve gone to the US. I’m sorry I didn’t come to the airport. I hope you do well there though. You deserve it after all your hard work since forever. Hyunwoo-hyung, fighting!”_

This time the message actually got cut off, leaving Hyunwoo in a daze.

Hyunwoo didn’t cry, he never did. He held it in the back of his eyes. Hyunwoo didn’t show his feelings. He was a robot. That was what Hyunwoo was. Hyunwoo didn’t cry.

He opened the second voicemail.

_“Hyung, I miss you.”_

And Hyunwoo did.

**Author's Note:**

> They were all exaggerating. Hyunwoo only went for a couple years and he would be back to Kihyun again. All was well. *shrug*


End file.
